Cease and Desist From Striving

Word of the Day
Beloved, cease and desist from your striving. There is a better and more effective way to walk out your life. You cannot add one hair to your head by striving. When you struggle to do things your own way, frustrations abound and you do things I have not called you to do.

All this self-effort causes self-inflicted burdens that weigh you down with guilt. These burdens have the power to remove your joy and the victory of walking in daily purpose. Before you know it, you have entered into a place of doing and not being.

Do you find yourself agreeing with the prognosis of your circumstances, those contrary words spoken by men or the enemy? Do you fear disappointing men more than you fear disappointing Me? Do they determine the walking out of your destiny? Or do I?

There are many times the constant contemplation of negative attitudes creates the very thing you long to be free from. Your biggest enemy is your own thought life. When you contemplate your negative attitudes they come out of your mouth and release words of death. Life and death are in the power of the tongue. Negative attitudes and words of death create blinders on your eyes. They become like sunglasses, obscuring My beauty and the true colors of My love for you.

If pessimistic thoughts are dwelt on long enough they can lead to a tendency to blame Me for the circumstance. This creates much frustration and leads to walking according to the flesh, not the spirit. Simply stated, it leads to unbelief. Therefore, let your contemplations be on My Word and not on wrong thinking or what you see, hear or feel. Let Me and My Word have the last word in every area of your life.

It is time for a new set of glasses, a new way of seeing. I am coming to open the eyes of your heart and free you from your self-defeating ways. I love you too much to let you stay where you are. Not only am I going to deal with your own self-assessments, I am going to deal with those infiltrating from the outside as well. So?look up and see?I am shining on you….Read Complete Love Letter…

Need to rest in Him. Try listening to “Rest In Me” a 45 minute Soaking Session

…for anyone who enters God’s rest also rests from his own work, just as God did from His. Let us, therefore, make every effort to enter that rest, so that no one will fall by following their example of disobedience. For the word of God is living and active. Sharper than any double-edged sword, it penetrates even to dividing soul and spirit, joints and marrow; it judges the thoughts and attitudes of the heart?(Hebrews 4:10-12 NIV)

Prayer
Father, I cease from striving and worrying. My own frustrations have seemed, at times, to be much bigger than You. You lead and guide my every step and I need not fear. Words of men do not matter to me. They do not hold the final authority in my life. I choose to think on what is pure, lovely and upright. I choose to think on You. Should I fear men who have no power over my soul? No. Purify my heart and cause my eyes to see the way You see. I receive new sight. Revelation and truth are my portion. You are shining on me today and every day. I am looking up. Amen.

Reflect and Journal

In what areas or ways have you been more afraid of displeasing men than displeasing the Lord?

What words have been spoken over you contrary to the promises of God?

Take authority over these words and break their power off your life with the blood and name of Jesus.

LORD, THANK YOU FOR SENDING YOUR WORD THIS MORNING TO ME THROUGH MRS. BRENDA. I REALLY APPRECIATE YOU FOR PLACING HER IN MY PATH AND FOR SPEAKING THROUGH AND USING HER VESSEL SO THAT YOU CAN MINISTER TO YOUR PEOPLE. AGAIN, THANK YOU JESUS. LORD, I KNOW THAT YOUR WORD IS TRUE AND YOU KNOW EVERYTHING THERE IS ABOUT ME, BECAUSE IT WAS YOU THAT MADE ME AND NOT ME MYSELF, YOU CHOSE ME, I DIDN’T CHOSE YOU. YOUR LOVE AND KINDNESS IS WHAT DREW ME TO YOU AND I HAVE NO REGRETS IN COMING TO YOU AND RECIEVING YOU INTO MY LIFE TO BE MY PERSONAL LORD AND SAVIOR, MY GREAT REDEEMER. YOU PAID A HORRIBLE PRICE FOR ME AND I WILL FOREVER OWE YOU MY LIFE, I CAN NEVER REPAY YOU FOR ALL YOU’VE DONE BUT THE LEASE I CAN SAY IS THANK YOU AND TRY WITH MY WHOLE HEART TO LIVE, OBEY, AND SERVE YOU. NO IT HASN’T BEEN EASY, AND YOU NEVER TOLD ME THAT IT WOULD BE. LORD, I REMEMBER WHEN I GAVE MY LIFE OVER TO YOU,YOU LET ME SAW IN MY DREAM WHERE YOU WERE LETTING ME DOWN IN THE WILDERNESS, I SAW WHAT I TOOK IT TO BE YOU LONG BRONZED ARM AND EVER SO WIDE HAND, IT WAS AS THOUGH YOU STOOD OVER MY BED,AND TILTED IT OVER AND I ENDED UP IN THE WILDERNESS, NOT UNDERSTANDING WHY,BUT THEN YOU TOLD ME THAT YOU WERE A GOD THAT’S MEEK AND LOWLY OF HEART, YOU SAID, IT IS IN THE WILDERNESS THAT YOU SEARCH OUT THE LOST, BUT IT SEEMED AS THOUGH WHEN THE FIREY DARTS OF THE EVIL ONE WOULD TRY TO TAKE ME OUT, YOU PROVIDED ME A WAY OF ESCAPE, IT WAS AS THOUGH WHEN THE FIREY DARTS WAS FIRED, YOU CAUSED ME TO LEAP UP HIGH OVER THE TALLEST TREES AND BUILDING AND NOTHING WAS ABLE TO HARM ME. MANY TIMES I HAD THESE DREAMS OF FLYING INTO THE AIR WHENEVER THE ENEMY TRIED TO HARM ME. BUT YOU TOLD ME THAT YOU WOULD PROVIDE A WAY OF ESCAPE FOR ME WHENEVER THE CAUSE WOULD PRESENT ITSELF. YOU SHOWED ME ANOTHER DREAM WHERE I WAS SOMEWHERE IN THE HEAVENLIES BUT I COULD STILL LOOK DOWN IN THE WILDERNESS AND SEE MY CARCASS LYING DOWN IN THE WILDERNESS AND I COULD HEAR SOMEONE CALLING OUT MY NAME. AGAIN, I DIDN’T UNDERSTAND UNTIL YOU TOLD ME THAT MY LIFE ARE HIDDEN IN YOU. I’VE LEARNED FROM THAT DAY TO THIS ONE THAT YOU ARE A GOD OF DREAMS AND VISIONS, SOME YOU’VE EXPLAINED AND SOME NOT EXPLAINED BUT I KNOW IN WHOM I BELIEVE AND THEREFORE I WILL FOREVER WITH YOUR HELP LIVE MY LIFE FOR YOU AND FOREVER LOVE YOU WITH MY WHOLE HEART. YOU ARE STILL PROVIDING WAYS OF ESCAPE FOR ME, SOME I TAKE AND SOME I DON’T, AND THATS BEEN ONE OF MY BIGGEST MISTAKES AND I ASK YOU TO FORGIVE ME.I HAVE GONE THROUGH SOOOOOO MUCH! EVERY SINCE THE VERY DAY I GAVE MY LIFE TO YOU,EVERY TIME I GO FORTH TO DO GOOD, EVIL PRESENTS ITSELF, BUT YOU NEVER TOLD ME THAT IT WOULDN’T, BUT YOU TOLD ME TO COUNT UP THE COSTS AND I REMEMBER THAT WHEN YOU SENT FOR PAUL, YOU SAID IT WAS TO SHOW HIM WHAT THINGS HE MUST SUFFER FOR YOUR NAME SAKE. YOU TOLD ME THAT IF I SUFFER FOR YOU, I WOULD RIEGN WITH YOU AND YOUR GRACE WILL BE SUFFICIENT. WOW!!!!! I’VE REALLY FOUND THIS TO BE TRUE. I HAVE BEEN TRIED AND TESTED BUT NOT LIKE YOU, BUT YOUR GRACE HAS BROUGHT ME SAFE THIS FAR, NOT SO MUCH AS MY FAITH, BUT YOUR FAITH AND CONFIDENCE IN THE WORDS AND PROMISES OF OUR GREAT HEAVENLY FATHER AND YOUR PRAYERS. LORD, I AM ABSOLUTELY NOTHING AND NOBODY WITHOUT YOU AND I CAN DO ABSOLUTELY NOTHING WITHOUT YOU. YOU ARE MY ALL IN ALL AND IF IT WASN’T FOR YOU, I’D GAVE UP A LONG TIME AGO BUT IT IS YOU AND THE PRAYERS OF THE RIGHTEOUS THAT KEEPS ME FROM GIVING UP. MY FAITH IS NOTHING LIKE IT WAS, SO MUCH AS HAPPEN AT THE HANDS OF THE ENEMY, MAN, MYSELF AND SOME YOU CAUSED BUT NEVERTHELESS, YOU HELPS ME IN THE MIST OF MY STRUGGLES TO PUSH FORWARD. I SEE AND HEAR SOO MUCH AND HAS GONE THROUGH A LOTS BUT YOUR GRACE HAS BEEN SUFFECIENT. LORD, YOU ARE ALWAYS RIGHT ABOUT ME AND INSPITE OF ALL YOU KNOW ABOUT ME, ALL THAT YOU HEAR FROM ANF ABOUT ME, ALL THAT YOU SEE ME DO, YOU STILL LOVES ME YOU HAVE NOT WALKED AWAY BUT YOU’VE BEEN FOREVER MERCIFUL. I HAVE BEEN SPIRITUALY VIOLATED BY MY ADVERSARIES, ABUSED VERBALLY, MENTALY AND PHSICALLY BY MEN, I’VE BEEN TALKED DOWN ON AND REDICULED,CRITISIZED, AND JUDGED BY MY CHRISTIAN FAMILIES, CASTOUT AND CAST DOWN, TREATED AS THOUGH I AM A LEPORSY, REJECTED OF MEN AND BY MEN AND YES, MY OWN WAY OF THINKING HAS CAUSE ME A LOT OF TROUBLE. NOW, I JUST GO TO CHURCH AND SUNDAY SCHOOL BECAUSE I LOVE SUNDAY SCHOOL BUT IT IS SOO NEGATIVE AND RESPECTER PERSONS, I LOVE PRAISING AND WORSHIPING YOU JESUS. I GO TO HEAR YOUR WORD AND FELLOWSHIP WITH THE SAINTS AND COME HOME. YES, YOU DO SPECIAL THINGS FOR ME IN THE SERVICE AS I SURRENDER MY VESSEL TO YOU. I GO BECAUSE BECAUSE I LOVE BEING IN YOUR SERVICES BUT SO MUCH HAS HAPPEN TO ME THERE UNTIL NOW I FEEL LIKE EVERYTHING YOU’VE PLACED IN ME HAS BEEN SIFFER OUT AND IT’S LIKE I’M GOING INTO MY ENEMIES CAMP BUT LOOKING TO YOU TO SEE ME THROUGH IT. LORD, I DON’T EVER WANT TO TURN MY BACK ON YOU NO MATTER HOW I’M TREATED, WITH YOUR HELP I KNOW YOU WILL ME ME GO THROUGH.YES, IF THERE HAS EVER BEEN A MORE POSSITIVE PERSON IN THEIR WALK WITH YOU, YOU MADE ME ONE OF THE, NOT THE ONLY ONE BUT ONE OF THEM. UNTIL ONE DAY AT PRAYER SERVICE AROUND THE ALTAR WHILE OTHERS WAS SITTING IN THEIR SEATS, I WENT STRAIGHT TO THE ALTAR, LYING PROSTRATED BEFORE YOU, ALLOWING THE HOLY SPIRIT TO HAVE ITS WAY AND HAD NOT BEEN RELEASED BY THE HOLY SPIRIT TO GET UP, I WAS RIDDICULED IN FRONT OF THE WHOLE CONGREGATION AND WAS GNASHINED UPON WITH THE TEETH OF THOSE THAT WAS AT PRAYER SERVICE,THEY SPOKE VERY HARSH OF ME. I WAS TRYING TO MAKE IT BACK TO YOU JESUS AND I JUST WANTED TO GET AROND THE ALTAR AND CRY OUT TO YOU TO HELP ME WHEN THEY CALLED FOR PRAYER, BUT I WAS TOLD THAT I WAS WRONG AND THAT I WAS A BEGGARBOND BUT I STILL TRIED TO PERSEVERE AND STAY BECAUSE I NEED TO BE DELIVERED AND RESTORED BACKED TO YOU JESUS. THATS HOW I RECEIVED YOU, AROUND THE ALTAR CRYING OUT TO YOU ON MY KNEES AND PROSTRATED, EVEN IN MY HOME ITS THE SAME WAY, BUT NOW, O’LORD, ITS SEEMS HARD FOR ME TO DO ANY OF IT ANYMORE. I ONLY WANTED TO PLEASE YOU AND STILL WANTS TO PLEASE ONLY YOU BUT BECAUSE OF THIS, I’M NOT CALLED UPON TO DO ANYTHING ANYMORE. LORD, THIS IS MY WAY OF RELEASING ALL TO YOU. WHENEVER YOU WOULD USE ME LORD, THE ENEMY OF OUR CONGREGATION STIRRS UP ENVY,JEALOUSY AND STRIFE IN THE MIST BUT WITH YOUR HELP I TRY TO HANG IN THERE AND KEEP GOING. JESUS, WHEN I WAS CAST OUT OF THE FAMILY OF GOD BY MY HOME CHURCH FAMILY AND WOUNDED BY MY SISTERS IN CHRIST I ENDED UP FALLING BACK, FEELING UNWANTED , UNLOVED, DISPISED AND REJECTED BUT I’VE NEVER WANTED TO LEAVE YOU AND ITS ALL BECAUSE OF YOU THAT I AM STILL CONFESSING YOUR NAME AND STILL A WITNESS FOR YOU. I KNOW I’M BEING HELD BACK IN OUR CHURCH FROM SINGING, TEACHING, AND PREACHING ITS BECAUSE MY PASTORS WIFE HAS A COMPLEX AGAINST ME BUT I STILL SHOW HER LOVE AND RESPECT AND I GO TO HER IN LOVE. I’VE EVEN STOOD BEFORE THE CONGRGATION AND REPENTED TO THEM AND HAS ASKED THEM AND THE LEADERS TO PLEASE FORGIVE ME FOR ALL OF MY OFFENSIVENESS, THEY SAY THEY HAVE BUT THROUGH THEIR ACTIONS AND REACTIONS TOWARDS ME I KNOW THAT THEY REALLY HAV’NT FORGIVEN ME. I HAVE GONE INTO THEIR OFFICE AND SET DOWN AND TALKED WITH MY LEADERS CONCERNING MY OFFENSES AND I ASKED THEM TO FORGIVE ME, THEY SAY THEY HAVE BUT THEIR ACTIONS AND REACTIONS SAYS SOMETHING DIFFERENT. I LOVE EACH AND EVERYONE OF THEM LORD AND I NEVER WANT TO HOLD ANYTHING IN MY HEART OR MIND AGAINST THEM, I WANT TO ALWAYS WITH YOUR HELP LORD, SHOW THEM LOVE AND KINDNESS. LORD, HELP ME NOT TO EVER WHOLE ENVY,JEALOUSY,STRIFE,MALICE,HATRED,JUDGMENT AND NONE OF THE OTHERS THAT FOLLOWS THIS LIST. I KNOW THAT I AM NOT PERFECT EITHER, BUT I AM ASKING YOU TO HELP ME TO ALWAYS FORGIVE AND FORGET AND MOVE ON AND NOT BE RESENTFUL. IT IS SOOOOO MUCH PARTIALLITY BUT I KNOW THAT YOU SEES ALL AND YOU KNOWS ALL, THATS WHAT YOU TOLD ME ON YESTERDAY WHEN THE ENEMY TRIED TO MAKE ME HAVE RESERVATIONS AND I STOLE AWAY IN MY HEART TO TELL YOU ABOUT IT AND YOU SAID TO ME, I SEE IT ALL AND THAT SETTLED IT FOR ME. THANK YOU JESUS FOR BEING BY MY SIDE. I KNOW THAT YOU ARE WITH ALL OF YOUR PEOPLE BUT I JUST WANT THIS TO BE PERSONAL BETWEEN YOU AND ME. LORD, I DO TOO MANYTHING OUT OF YOUR WILL TO HOLD UNFORGIVENESS AGAINST ANYBODY. I NEED YOU MORE THAN ANY CHILD YOU GOT. I KNOW YOU LOVE ME BECAUSE IF NOT YOU WOULDN;T GIVE ME SOOOOOOOOOO MANY CHANCES. WHEN I WAS WALLOWING AND POLUTED IN MY OWN BLOOD, YOU REACHED WAY DOWN WITH YOUR PRECIOUS NAILED SCARED HANDS AND PICKED ME UP, WASHED ME AND MADE ME WHOLE. SOOOOOO MANY TIMESSSSSSSS LORDDDDDDDD, SOOOOOOO MANY TIMES. AND I AM GRATEFUL. I KNOW THAT I AM NOT THE BEST THAT YOU HAVE BUT YOU SAY I AM ONE OF THEM. THANK YOU. NO, I DON’T FEEL LIKE WHO YOU SAY I AM BUT I KNOW IF YOU SAID IT THEN I AUGHT TO BELIEVE IT AND ITS SETTLED. LORD, FORGIVE ME FOR ALL OF MY SINS, SINS OF OMITTIONS AND CO-MISSIONS, FORGIVE ME FOR ALL OF MY UN-REPENTED SINS, SINS OF MY PASS AND FORGIVE ME OF ALL MY SECRET SINS AND ALL OF MY PERSUMPTION SINS, MY VAIN THOUGHTS AND ALL OF MY WICKED AMAGINATIONS, FORGIVE ME OF ALL MY DOUBTS AND FEARS AND ALL THAT I FAIL IN ASKING THAT NEEDED TO BE REPENTED OF, THEN LORD JESUS, EVEN THOSE I REPENT OF AND ASK YOU TO FORGIVE ME AND HELP ME TO BE THE WOMAN THAT YOU HAS CALLED ME OUT OF DARKNESS INTO YOUR MARVELOUS LIGHT TO BE. JESUS I GIVE YOU PERMISSION TO REMOVE AND DESTROY EVERTHING THATS IN MY HEART AND MIND THATS NOT PLEASING YOU NOR MY FELLOW SISTERS AND BROTHERS, IN JESUS NAME I PRAY, AMEN: THANKS MRS. BRENDA FOR READING THIS. LOVE ALWAYS, YOUR SISTER IN CHRIST, JENNIE. MERRY CHRISTMAS AND HAPPY NEW YEARS. I PRAY THAT ALL OF YOUR FAMILY AND FRIENDS AND NEIGHBOURS ARE SAFE AND DOING WELL IN JESUS NAME. LETS KEEP PRAYING FOR THE FAMILIES THATS GOING THROUGH.

1 Comment

JENNIE says:

December 17, 2012 at 11:48 am

LORD, THANK YOU FOR SENDING YOUR WORD THIS MORNING TO ME THROUGH MRS. BRENDA. I REALLY APPRECIATE YOU FOR PLACING HER IN MY PATH AND FOR SPEAKING THROUGH AND USING HER VESSEL SO THAT YOU CAN MINISTER TO YOUR PEOPLE. AGAIN, THANK YOU JESUS. LORD, I KNOW THAT YOUR WORD IS TRUE AND YOU KNOW EVERYTHING THERE IS ABOUT ME, BECAUSE IT WAS YOU THAT MADE ME AND NOT ME MYSELF, YOU CHOSE ME, I DIDN’T CHOSE YOU. YOUR LOVE AND KINDNESS IS WHAT DREW ME TO YOU AND I HAVE NO REGRETS IN COMING TO YOU AND RECIEVING YOU INTO MY LIFE TO BE MY PERSONAL LORD AND SAVIOR, MY GREAT REDEEMER. YOU PAID A HORRIBLE PRICE FOR ME AND I WILL FOREVER OWE YOU MY LIFE, I CAN NEVER REPAY YOU FOR ALL YOU’VE DONE BUT THE LEASE I CAN SAY IS THANK YOU AND TRY WITH MY WHOLE HEART TO LIVE, OBEY, AND SERVE YOU. NO IT HASN’T BEEN EASY, AND YOU NEVER TOLD ME THAT IT WOULD BE. LORD, I REMEMBER WHEN I GAVE MY LIFE OVER TO YOU,YOU LET ME SAW IN MY DREAM WHERE YOU WERE LETTING ME DOWN IN THE WILDERNESS, I SAW WHAT I TOOK IT TO BE YOU LONG BRONZED ARM AND EVER SO WIDE HAND, IT WAS AS THOUGH YOU STOOD OVER MY BED,AND TILTED IT OVER AND I ENDED UP IN THE WILDERNESS, NOT UNDERSTANDING WHY,BUT THEN YOU TOLD ME THAT YOU WERE A GOD THAT’S MEEK AND LOWLY OF HEART, YOU SAID, IT IS IN THE WILDERNESS THAT YOU SEARCH OUT THE LOST, BUT IT SEEMED AS THOUGH WHEN THE FIREY DARTS OF THE EVIL ONE WOULD TRY TO TAKE ME OUT, YOU PROVIDED ME A WAY OF ESCAPE, IT WAS AS THOUGH WHEN THE FIREY DARTS WAS FIRED, YOU CAUSED ME TO LEAP UP HIGH OVER THE TALLEST TREES AND BUILDING AND NOTHING WAS ABLE TO HARM ME. MANY TIMES I HAD THESE DREAMS OF FLYING INTO THE AIR WHENEVER THE ENEMY TRIED TO HARM ME. BUT YOU TOLD ME THAT YOU WOULD PROVIDE A WAY OF ESCAPE FOR ME WHENEVER THE CAUSE WOULD PRESENT ITSELF. YOU SHOWED ME ANOTHER DREAM WHERE I WAS SOMEWHERE IN THE HEAVENLIES BUT I COULD STILL LOOK DOWN IN THE WILDERNESS AND SEE MY CARCASS LYING DOWN IN THE WILDERNESS AND I COULD HEAR SOMEONE CALLING OUT MY NAME. AGAIN, I DIDN’T UNDERSTAND UNTIL YOU TOLD ME THAT MY LIFE ARE HIDDEN IN YOU. I’VE LEARNED FROM THAT DAY TO THIS ONE THAT YOU ARE A GOD OF DREAMS AND VISIONS, SOME YOU’VE EXPLAINED AND SOME NOT EXPLAINED BUT I KNOW IN WHOM I BELIEVE AND THEREFORE I WILL FOREVER WITH YOUR HELP LIVE MY LIFE FOR YOU AND FOREVER LOVE YOU WITH MY WHOLE HEART. YOU ARE STILL PROVIDING WAYS OF ESCAPE FOR ME, SOME I TAKE AND SOME I DON’T, AND THATS BEEN ONE OF MY BIGGEST MISTAKES AND I ASK YOU TO FORGIVE ME.I HAVE GONE THROUGH SOOOOOO MUCH! EVERY SINCE THE VERY DAY I GAVE MY LIFE TO YOU,EVERY TIME I GO FORTH TO DO GOOD, EVIL PRESENTS ITSELF, BUT YOU NEVER TOLD ME THAT IT WOULDN’T, BUT YOU TOLD ME TO COUNT UP THE COSTS AND I REMEMBER THAT WHEN YOU SENT FOR PAUL, YOU SAID IT WAS TO SHOW HIM WHAT THINGS HE MUST SUFFER FOR YOUR NAME SAKE. YOU TOLD ME THAT IF I SUFFER FOR YOU, I WOULD RIEGN WITH YOU AND YOUR GRACE WILL BE SUFFICIENT. WOW!!!!! I’VE REALLY FOUND THIS TO BE TRUE. I HAVE BEEN TRIED AND TESTED BUT NOT LIKE YOU, BUT YOUR GRACE HAS BROUGHT ME SAFE THIS FAR, NOT SO MUCH AS MY FAITH, BUT YOUR FAITH AND CONFIDENCE IN THE WORDS AND PROMISES OF OUR GREAT HEAVENLY FATHER AND YOUR PRAYERS. LORD, I AM ABSOLUTELY NOTHING AND NOBODY WITHOUT YOU AND I CAN DO ABSOLUTELY NOTHING WITHOUT YOU. YOU ARE MY ALL IN ALL AND IF IT WASN’T FOR YOU, I’D GAVE UP A LONG TIME AGO BUT IT IS YOU AND THE PRAYERS OF THE RIGHTEOUS THAT KEEPS ME FROM GIVING UP. MY FAITH IS NOTHING LIKE IT WAS, SO MUCH AS HAPPEN AT THE HANDS OF THE ENEMY, MAN, MYSELF AND SOME YOU CAUSED BUT NEVERTHELESS, YOU HELPS ME IN THE MIST OF MY STRUGGLES TO PUSH FORWARD. I SEE AND HEAR SOO MUCH AND HAS GONE THROUGH A LOTS BUT YOUR GRACE HAS BEEN SUFFECIENT. LORD, YOU ARE ALWAYS RIGHT ABOUT ME AND INSPITE OF ALL YOU KNOW ABOUT ME, ALL THAT YOU HEAR FROM ANF ABOUT ME, ALL THAT YOU SEE ME DO, YOU STILL LOVES ME YOU HAVE NOT WALKED AWAY BUT YOU’VE BEEN FOREVER MERCIFUL. I HAVE BEEN SPIRITUALY VIOLATED BY MY ADVERSARIES, ABUSED VERBALLY, MENTALY AND PHSICALLY BY MEN, I’VE BEEN TALKED DOWN ON AND REDICULED,CRITISIZED, AND JUDGED BY MY CHRISTIAN FAMILIES, CASTOUT AND CAST DOWN, TREATED AS THOUGH I AM A LEPORSY, REJECTED OF MEN AND BY MEN AND YES, MY OWN WAY OF THINKING HAS CAUSE ME A LOT OF TROUBLE. NOW, I JUST GO TO CHURCH AND SUNDAY SCHOOL BECAUSE I LOVE SUNDAY SCHOOL BUT IT IS SOO NEGATIVE AND RESPECTER PERSONS, I LOVE PRAISING AND WORSHIPING YOU JESUS. I GO TO HEAR YOUR WORD AND FELLOWSHIP WITH THE SAINTS AND COME HOME. YES, YOU DO SPECIAL THINGS FOR ME IN THE SERVICE AS I SURRENDER MY VESSEL TO YOU. I GO BECAUSE BECAUSE I LOVE BEING IN YOUR SERVICES BUT SO MUCH HAS HAPPEN TO ME THERE UNTIL NOW I FEEL LIKE EVERYTHING YOU’VE PLACED IN ME HAS BEEN SIFFER OUT AND IT’S LIKE I’M GOING INTO MY ENEMIES CAMP BUT LOOKING TO YOU TO SEE ME THROUGH IT. LORD, I DON’T EVER WANT TO TURN MY BACK ON YOU NO MATTER HOW I’M TREATED, WITH YOUR HELP I KNOW YOU WILL ME ME GO THROUGH.YES, IF THERE HAS EVER BEEN A MORE POSSITIVE PERSON IN THEIR WALK WITH YOU, YOU MADE ME ONE OF THE, NOT THE ONLY ONE BUT ONE OF THEM. UNTIL ONE DAY AT PRAYER SERVICE AROUND THE ALTAR WHILE OTHERS WAS SITTING IN THEIR SEATS, I WENT STRAIGHT TO THE ALTAR, LYING PROSTRATED BEFORE YOU, ALLOWING THE HOLY SPIRIT TO HAVE ITS WAY AND HAD NOT BEEN RELEASED BY THE HOLY SPIRIT TO GET UP, I WAS RIDDICULED IN FRONT OF THE WHOLE CONGREGATION AND WAS GNASHINED UPON WITH THE TEETH OF THOSE THAT WAS AT PRAYER SERVICE,THEY SPOKE VERY HARSH OF ME. I WAS TRYING TO MAKE IT BACK TO YOU JESUS AND I JUST WANTED TO GET AROND THE ALTAR AND CRY OUT TO YOU TO HELP ME WHEN THEY CALLED FOR PRAYER, BUT I WAS TOLD THAT I WAS WRONG AND THAT I WAS A BEGGARBOND BUT I STILL TRIED TO PERSEVERE AND STAY BECAUSE I NEED TO BE DELIVERED AND RESTORED BACKED TO YOU JESUS. THATS HOW I RECEIVED YOU, AROUND THE ALTAR CRYING OUT TO YOU ON MY KNEES AND PROSTRATED, EVEN IN MY HOME ITS THE SAME WAY, BUT NOW, O’LORD, ITS SEEMS HARD FOR ME TO DO ANY OF IT ANYMORE. I ONLY WANTED TO PLEASE YOU AND STILL WANTS TO PLEASE ONLY YOU BUT BECAUSE OF THIS, I’M NOT CALLED UPON TO DO ANYTHING ANYMORE. LORD, THIS IS MY WAY OF RELEASING ALL TO YOU. WHENEVER YOU WOULD USE ME LORD, THE ENEMY OF OUR CONGREGATION STIRRS UP ENVY,JEALOUSY AND STRIFE IN THE MIST BUT WITH YOUR HELP I TRY TO HANG IN THERE AND KEEP GOING. JESUS, WHEN I WAS CAST OUT OF THE FAMILY OF GOD BY MY HOME CHURCH FAMILY AND WOUNDED BY MY SISTERS IN CHRIST I ENDED UP FALLING BACK, FEELING UNWANTED , UNLOVED, DISPISED AND REJECTED BUT I’VE NEVER WANTED TO LEAVE YOU AND ITS ALL BECAUSE OF YOU THAT I AM STILL CONFESSING YOUR NAME AND STILL A WITNESS FOR YOU. I KNOW I’M BEING HELD BACK IN OUR CHURCH FROM SINGING, TEACHING, AND PREACHING ITS BECAUSE MY PASTORS WIFE HAS A COMPLEX AGAINST ME BUT I STILL SHOW HER LOVE AND RESPECT AND I GO TO HER IN LOVE. I’VE EVEN STOOD BEFORE THE CONGRGATION AND REPENTED TO THEM AND HAS ASKED THEM AND THE LEADERS TO PLEASE FORGIVE ME FOR ALL OF MY OFFENSIVENESS, THEY SAY THEY HAVE BUT THROUGH THEIR ACTIONS AND REACTIONS TOWARDS ME I KNOW THAT THEY REALLY HAV’NT FORGIVEN ME. I HAVE GONE INTO THEIR OFFICE AND SET DOWN AND TALKED WITH MY LEADERS CONCERNING MY OFFENSES AND I ASKED THEM TO FORGIVE ME, THEY SAY THEY HAVE BUT THEIR ACTIONS AND REACTIONS SAYS SOMETHING DIFFERENT. I LOVE EACH AND EVERYONE OF THEM LORD AND I NEVER WANT TO HOLD ANYTHING IN MY HEART OR MIND AGAINST THEM, I WANT TO ALWAYS WITH YOUR HELP LORD, SHOW THEM LOVE AND KINDNESS. LORD, HELP ME NOT TO EVER WHOLE ENVY,JEALOUSY,STRIFE,MALICE,HATRED,JUDGMENT AND NONE OF THE OTHERS THAT FOLLOWS THIS LIST. I KNOW THAT I AM NOT PERFECT EITHER, BUT I AM ASKING YOU TO HELP ME TO ALWAYS FORGIVE AND FORGET AND MOVE ON AND NOT BE RESENTFUL. IT IS SOOOOO MUCH PARTIALLITY BUT I KNOW THAT YOU SEES ALL AND YOU KNOWS ALL, THATS WHAT YOU TOLD ME ON YESTERDAY WHEN THE ENEMY TRIED TO MAKE ME HAVE RESERVATIONS AND I STOLE AWAY IN MY HEART TO TELL YOU ABOUT IT AND YOU SAID TO ME, I SEE IT ALL AND THAT SETTLED IT FOR ME. THANK YOU JESUS FOR BEING BY MY SIDE. I KNOW THAT YOU ARE WITH ALL OF YOUR PEOPLE BUT I JUST WANT THIS TO BE PERSONAL BETWEEN YOU AND ME. LORD, I DO TOO MANYTHING OUT OF YOUR WILL TO HOLD UNFORGIVENESS AGAINST ANYBODY. I NEED YOU MORE THAN ANY CHILD YOU GOT. I KNOW YOU LOVE ME BECAUSE IF NOT YOU WOULDN;T GIVE ME SOOOOOOOOOO MANY CHANCES. WHEN I WAS WALLOWING AND POLUTED IN MY OWN BLOOD, YOU REACHED WAY DOWN WITH YOUR PRECIOUS NAILED SCARED HANDS AND PICKED ME UP, WASHED ME AND MADE ME WHOLE. SOOOOOO MANY TIMESSSSSSSS LORDDDDDDDD, SOOOOOOO MANY TIMES. AND I AM GRATEFUL. I KNOW THAT I AM NOT THE BEST THAT YOU HAVE BUT YOU SAY I AM ONE OF THEM. THANK YOU. NO, I DON’T FEEL LIKE WHO YOU SAY I AM BUT I KNOW IF YOU SAID IT THEN I AUGHT TO BELIEVE IT AND ITS SETTLED. LORD, FORGIVE ME FOR ALL OF MY SINS, SINS OF OMITTIONS AND CO-MISSIONS, FORGIVE ME FOR ALL OF MY UN-REPENTED SINS, SINS OF MY PASS AND FORGIVE ME OF ALL MY SECRET SINS AND ALL OF MY PERSUMPTION SINS, MY VAIN THOUGHTS AND ALL OF MY WICKED AMAGINATIONS, FORGIVE ME OF ALL MY DOUBTS AND FEARS AND ALL THAT I FAIL IN ASKING THAT NEEDED TO BE REPENTED OF, THEN LORD JESUS, EVEN THOSE I REPENT OF AND ASK YOU TO FORGIVE ME AND HELP ME TO BE THE WOMAN THAT YOU HAS CALLED ME OUT OF DARKNESS INTO YOUR MARVELOUS LIGHT TO BE. JESUS I GIVE YOU PERMISSION TO REMOVE AND DESTROY EVERTHING THATS IN MY HEART AND MIND THATS NOT PLEASING YOU NOR MY FELLOW SISTERS AND BROTHERS, IN JESUS NAME I PRAY, AMEN: THANKS MRS. BRENDA FOR READING THIS. LOVE ALWAYS, YOUR SISTER IN CHRIST, JENNIE. MERRY CHRISTMAS AND HAPPY NEW YEARS. I PRAY THAT ALL OF YOUR FAMILY AND FRIENDS AND NEIGHBOURS ARE SAFE AND DOING WELL IN JESUS NAME. LETS KEEP PRAYING FOR THE FAMILIES THATS GOING THROUGH.

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