The Drumbeats Of Heaven

The Drumbeats Of Heaven And The Healing Of The Heart

Accompanying Instrumental Soaking by Hal Leath

One day as I sat down to be in His Presence with my noise cancelling headphones on (this is important), I had a thought so simple it couldn’t possibly form without listening to music as I normally do. Just speak His Name? I thought, why not!

I whispered the name Jesus and I was instantly with Him before the throne, in the heavenly realm. Dizzy with breathless, I felt as if my heart would explode with the wonder of His great love for me.

With peripheral noise blocked by my head phones, I could hear my heart beating. It was deep and intentional, sounding like the deep notes of a base drum. My chest hammered with every beat. I began tapping my collarbone with my fingers. The tapping sounded like the sharp staccato of a snare drum. I observed a cloud of witnesses drumming to the rhythm of my tapping. This went on for several minutes and then I syncopated my tapping to their rhythm.

Joined by my family, we were sitting with Jesus as the drummers encircled us. I began prophesying to myself and my family as the Lord revealed. I was hearing the sounds of war and He was sending out the hosts to accomplish my declarations. They will not return void. With the crashing crescendo of the heavenly percussionist…I opened my mouth…

I Began Singing

As I began, my singing and speaking in the spirit transformed into a new sound. The Lord spoke to me saying “the drums were the drums of war against my enemies…my family’s enemies…farther back than I could even imagine”. The sound was penetrating the marrow of my bones, renewing the very stem cells in my blood…even the molecular structure of my DNA.

The drums changed rhythm many times. There were different rhythms for deliverance, healing, infilling, outpouring and so much more. I moved in and out of these cycles with memories popping up along the way. Each one I dealt with according to His instructions.

John 20:23 flashed before me. “If you forgive the sins of any, they are forgiven them; if you retain the sins of any, they are retained”. The Lord said “You must stand in the gap for your family, who are unable or unwilling to ask for forgiveness and cannot receive from Me”. I saw the circle of drummers tighten around them and the sound of war against my enemies grew intensely. The Lord said “The drummers will not depart as long as you stay in a place of ascended intercession with no judgement”.

Breathless

I was mesmerized by the magnificent event unfolding before me…I could touch His face…feel His heart…and I closed my eyes at the softness of His kiss on my face. O, to be loved by Jesus…O, to love Him in return.

During this time the Lord revisited two incidents in my childhood. I had no idea how greatly they had affected me and were triggers in my life. The specifics aren’t important, but the significance of the resolution is.

The first revelation; I don’t ever remember being embraced or deeply hugged in a way that I felt loved and safe as a child. I’m not saying I was not loved; it was the expression of love that was missing. As an adopted child, I was always told adopted children were more loved and wanted than natural children because they were handpicked. I never felt that in any meaningful way.

This created a sense of abandonment that plagued me into adulthood. Also the words I heard and the actions I saw were inconsistent. This inconsistency creating insecurity and the insecurity fostered fear. As you can image this overwhelming fear coupled with abandonment ushered me to a desperate place in my life.

My perception, true or not was my reality. My reality was; you say I am special and loved more than others, but your actions leave me in pain and hurt. To me it was natural to look at my heavenly Father and think, He does not mean what He says and He will not protect me. He, to me, was like many in my life; He would say one thing and then do something else. In the midst of this I could find no sanctuary.

In the beginning when I found Jesus and fell in love with Him the journey was amazing. As time passed however, I allowed the deep-seated wounding to interfere with our relationship, questioning whether He truly loved me just because His Word said so. I have been delivered from most all of the wounding, but the Lord took me back to a pivotal root moment when I made the decision not to believe the words I heard for they never lined up with my perception of truth.

In this moment of revelation, I felt the closeness of the Lord and He whispered “recall someone who hugged you with love and intention”. I recoiled in my spirit and thought why would you say something so painful? I was instantly filled with sadness and emptiness. Not missing a beat, He reminded me of my grandmother who died when I was around 12. I spent my young days after school at her house and I loved her so. She was and remains my main source of childhood love. He knew I could not recall those elusive embraces. The Lord is always seeking the deeper things and many times we can’t see though the opaqueness of our surface issues. He was after something deeper.

He Wants So Much More…He Wants It All.

I have been married to my childhood-high school sweetheart for almost 42 years. My second revelation; the Lord revealed to me that my hubby has blessed me in so many ways, but I felt the same about him and viewed his affection through this painful childhood lens. How could it be that my beloved hubby had hugged me countless times and yet when asked by the Lord the memory was invisible to me.

How many benefits of my husband’s hugs had I missed because of the lens I was viewing him through? Is there a “Sigh”? Yes, there is, but in my long walk with the Lord, I have come to understand and understand very well that He wants it all. He is never satisfied with partial freedom. He is never content to just open the prison door, He wants to demolish the entire prison.

The Heart Of It – My Husband’s Hug

I did the only thing I knew to do, go to the heavenly place and worship. With drums beating and His love flooding my heart, He revealed to me a hug my hubby gave me just a few days ago. Even more he allowed me to experience it! As he leaves for work in the morning it is our ritual to embrace in a real and profound way. We pull each other in close and hold each other tight. We tell each other how much we love the other and then we seal it with a kiss. Instantly the Lord raced me back to two particular moments in my childhood and there was my husband hugging me. I was overpowered by the Father’s love. His love was breaking the lie and pulling out the roots of what I still believed in subtle ways.

Ode To Being Vulnerable

I’m sharing this because He told me to. Vulnerability is healing, for there are many like me who have experienced things which have left deep and painful roots. Clinging to these things keeps us from the fullness of intimacy with the Lord and the fullness of intimacy with our loved ones. He wants us free! Without healing is very difficult to walk down the path He has destined for us.
Because we are the house of God we have access to the courts and realms of heaven. We are in union with Christ and we are one spirit with Him. Do we always feel like we can go to the heavenly realms and reflect on our life? No, but our feelings are not the barometer we go by. God’s Word is! According to His Word we are positionally already there. All we need to do is acknowledge that as fact and constantly remind our heart of our lofty position.

Is It Easy

Is it easy? I say, yes, because it is a choice to believe the Word over feelings or wrong doctrine. Try it, with or without soft music and hear what He has to say. Take the time to be in His presence and begin to worship. Take time to prepare your heart to hear and receive. This preparation is more about positioning yourself and less about Him because He is standing there with arms out stretched. Allow Him to soften your heart and allow His love to permeate you. When you are ready ask Him this simple question, “What do You want to show me”? He will not ignore you. He will not abandon you. His Word is truth and has the power to dismantle all that has holds you captive.

You will hear the drumbeat of His heart in perfect rhythm. Yield to Him and allow him to compose His heavenly symphony in your heart. It will be a symphony penned with notes of healing, notes of freedom and a refrain of deliverance.

Now I’m so excited about the gift that is my husband’s hugs. Every time he embraces me, I receive more healing. I may have been deprived in my younger years but no longer. I will cherish every hug I receive from those who love me. Most of all, I will cherish spending time with my Jesus and my Abba Father in the embrace of Their great love. Selah!

In The Father’s Embrace
With Jesus Face to Face
Abiding In The Heavenly Place
Brenda & Duane Craig 2017